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Fodder 4 Fathers - A Dad Blog Like No Other

Entries in child abuse (4)


"Dastardly Dads" or Misguided Moms, You Be the Judge

Maybe I live a sheltered life, but I’ve always tried my best to see the good in people. Now, no one is perfect and there are many people out there that may not be what I would call “upstanding citizens,” but it doesn’t mean that I spend all my time worrying about them. There are good people and there are bad people, and there are certainly many more people who walk a very fine line each and every day. Now, I could worry about what other people do, but I don’t. I worry about what I do, or what I can do to make the world a better place. I could easily look at all the negative that goes on around me and think we are all going to hell in a hand basket, but I choose not to. I read the newspaper, I watch the evening news, I listen to the radio, but I don’t let it define my outlook on the world. I think people are inherently good, and that’s what allows me to walk out my front door every day without fearing that the sky is going to fall, or worse, I’m going to be attacked by zombies. But not everyone sees the world as I do…

I am well aware that there are people who think the worst of others. People who focus all their energy of finding the worst that mankind has to offer and sticking it your face and saying "See! See! I told you so!" And, I guess everyone is entitled to their opinion, but some people are nothing more than fear mongers. Take this website for example, What is the purpose of this site? Is it to educate? Not really. Is it to inform? Not in a balanced way. Is it out to make an entire segment of the population look like rapists and child molesters and liars to suit their own, seemingly twisted, agenda? Possibly? What is this site? Is it propaganda? I mean, who looks solely for newspaper articles from around the world that talk about dads molesting children? And moreover, who does this and then doesn’t also look for articles where moms are committing these crimes? (And it does happen, more than you would like to think). Most people would call this a witch hunt. I call it man hating, but that’s just an opinion.

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From Back to the Future (1985)The other day I asked a pretty straight-forward question on our Facebook page: “If you could go back in time and tell your Father one thing before he had kids, what would it be?” To be honest, I didn’t know what to expect. I was hoping people would be honest and say what was truly in their hearts, but I didn’t expect the rawness of the responses we received. But I’m thankful to our fans for opening up and sharing their stories with us, as maybe, just maybe, by reading some of the comments we got, we might get a few men to think long and hard before they even think about having kids, and put them on to a better path, for themselves and their unborn children- before it’s too late.

Our fans held nothing back. And they said exactly what was on their minds and in their hearts. And if this doesn’t give a few men a reason to pause and change their ways, nothing will. What do people wish they could go back in time to say to their dads? Lots!  Here are the top ten responses (in no particular order):

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Fodder Up! Dads - Protecting Your Children from Sexual Abuse

When I started this blog it was with the intention of educating myself about the ins and outs of what it truly means to be a “great” dad.  I didn’t have the best role model in my own father. He wasn’t what you’d call hands on, but having said that, I have no doubt that he loves me in his own, call it misguided way. He wasn’t the ideal dad, and I’ve come to accept that not every dad is meant to be an exceptional father, but to his credit, on his worst day, my dad wasn’t half as bad as some of the fathers you read about in the newspapers: the abandoners (not a word), the abusers, the abhorrent assholes who would sexually mistreat their own child.  My father was a failure in many ways, but when it came to protecting his young children from the evils of the world, my dad never let me down, and it’s sad to think not every child can say the same.

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There’s a great line from my favorite film that says a man who puts himself in a position to be a force for change will "either die the hero or live long enough to become the villain" (The Dark Knight, 2008). Now, I don't fancy myself a hero, and I certainly don't see myself as anything more than what I am- a guy who merely wants to do right by his kid- but I certainly know that the double-edged sword of public opinion cuts both ways. And when you put yourself out there, you never know how your actions will be perceived from one moment until the next.

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