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Fodder 4 Fathers - A Dad Blog Like No Other

Entries in babies (7)



his week we’d like to introduce an exciting new segment to our blog. We call it Kiddie Proofing, which is a pretty apt name considering the author of these posts will be David Drutz, owner of the ever expanding Kiddie Proofers stores in our hometown of Toronto. We asked David to introduce himself while we collect a few questions from our fans for him to answer in the upcoming weeks. He’s got an interesting story to tell and an even more interesting perspective on child safety, which is what we like around here…

An Introduction to Child Safety By: David Drutz

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The "Fears" and "Phobias" of Parents - And How Not to Pass Them On to Your Kids

I’ve never been the kind of guy to critique other people’s parenting skills. I’m pretty much a live and let live kind of guy. As long as you’re not giving me unsolicited advice on how to raise my kids and you’re not doing things to your own kids that make me want to cringe, or punch you in the face, I’m willing to accept that there are many different schools of thought on how to raise YOUR child. But if there’s one thing that bothers me, it’s when parents pass their fears and phobias on to their kids.

Let me rephrase that: I hate when people pass on their strong DISLIKES, especially when they are just biases, on to their kids. I understand that some people have real, horrifying, debilitating fears, and I’m sympathetic to those who literally freeze when they see a spider, or won’t go in to the ocean for fear of being eaten by a shark, or believe that microscopic organisms will be the death of them. It happens. But I cannot stand when I see people passing on their passionate prejudices against certain animals just because they think they’re dirty and they “don’t like them.”

Where did these people get these fears? Well, their parents of course. It seems certain revulsions just keep getting passed down from generation from generation, and seemingly for no reason.  Yes, I get a person being afraid of a dog because they were bitten by one as a child, and I understand that if you were chased home by a big dog as a kid that it would leave your scarred for life, but not letting your kid like dogs simply because your think they’re “annoying,” is well, ummm, stupid. There are lots of things that I think are stupid as a Parent – like Barney and The Wiggles and Onesies with snaps- but I don’t make a big deal about them to the point where my children become afraid of them.

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Make 'Em Laugh - The Best Part of Parenting

Tonight my wife and I were sitting around after dinner playing with the kids. I was holding my 6-month-old son making fart noises in to his neck while my wife was trying to have a serious conversation with our daughter about why it's not nice to poke Daddy in the eye. The TV was off (my daughter's punishment for acting up) and it was just the four of us, winding down our day. My wife and I were both tired - two kids under the age of three will do that to you - but we weren't so tired that we weren't able to enjoy the moment. My daughter, at her defiant best, was saying the funniest sh@# trying to defuse the situation that got her in to trouble, and my son, well, he just wanted someone to give him his fair share of attention. So there we were, trying not to laugh at our little girl as she strung together some of the funniest sentences ever uttered by a toddler and doing our best not to stop our son as he attempted to fit his whole fist in to his mouth. It was a moment worth savoring.

Some days it's not so easy to smile when your kids are crying or cranky or making you crazy. And it's not so easy to laugh when you feel like you haven't had more than 5 hours of sleep a night for over 6 months. But when you find yourself in that moment where all is right in the world and your kids are happy and you're all together,r you have to make sure to slow things down and realize that this is what it's all about; this is why you decided to become parents in the first place.

So we did. We slowed things down... long enough to get my daughter's awesome laugh on "tape." Because no matter how stressed out we get, or how much we wish that we could sleep in on weekends again, or not have to deal with toddler tantrums or a baby crying at 5:45 a.m., we know how good we have it, and we never want to forget it.





Damned If You Do... Just as Damned if You Don't

You know and I know that your wife does herself a disservice every time she berates you for doing "it" wrong. The "it" in question may be how you change a diaper, or wash the baby bottles, or keep to the strict schedule that she tries to enforce regarding when your baby eats, sleeps and plays. She'll complain about how tired she is because she has to do everything herself, but you and I both know that is self inflicted because, truth be told, you are quite capable of handling your new duties as a parent but your way of doing things doesn't quite live up to your wife's stringent expectations, and that's her problem, not yours.

This article dispels the many myths surrounding the uselessness of first-time dads. I suggest you show it to your wife so she learns to back the hell off and let you handle your fair share of the responsibilities. If not, she'll have no one else to blame when she can't get a seconds rest because you're too useless to help out.

Unless, you really are useless. Then she's got a point, you lazy, useless bastard.




Unsolicited Advice on Child Rearing: The Nice Way to Say Thanks But No Thanks

I'm not saying I don't appreciate advice. I do, when I ask for it. The problem is when you have a new baby everyone and their mother has some advice to give and, frankly, it can get to be a bit much. The truth is everyone is an expert on their own child. But, that's just it, my child is NOT your child, and I only recognize three authorities when it comes to the care of  MY CHILD: 1) Her pediatrician, 2) The "What to Expect When..." series of baby books, and 3) Telehealth Ontario (a helpline where you can seek advice from experienced nurses). That's it.

So you can talk about Dr. Spock, or Ferberizing, or how back in the day babies slept just fine on their stomachs, but if you're talking about MY CHILD, who already sleeps 12 hours a night, rarely cries and doesn't need to crawl before 14 months, shut up!

I thank-you for your understanding.