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Sunday
Mar102013

Why Jokes Poking Fun At Fathers Are Funny

If anyone knows our blog, you know that even though I advocate for better fatherhood involvement, I`m in full support of parental equality. That`s not to say I don`t appreciate a good dad or husband joke here or there, but if someone`s going to make one it should at least be funny. Problem is, too often, there is a type of mom who tries to make a joke directed at dads and the real joke is on her - it's not funny. Not because dads are offended, but because the joke’s been done, and done to death.  It's the equivalent of a Dad Blogger bringing back old “Henny” Youngman jokes saying: "Take my wife, please?" It's tired, and stale and well, lazy writing. 

Was it a slow news day when ScaryMommy.Com decided to post this article entitled, 10 Ways You Husband is Just Another Child, by Rebecca Gallagher (that was also picked up by Shine by Yahoo)- I don't know? But it was obviously written, and posted, and reposted looking for some kind of reaction from dads. And, I don't usually play this game, but I thought it would be fun for once. It's well known that I don't poke fun at moms, because I actually value the ones who appreciate the value of a good dad; the men I try to promote on my Facebook page and Website. But, anyone who knows me well enough knows that I do that consciously- but that's not to say I can't act like an indignant dad, up in arms over this post.

 

I know a little bit about sarcasm, so, I thought I’d write a funny response to this article. You know, something a little tongue-in-cheek and not too offensive to someone with a great sense of humor like Rebecca Gallager, or the ladies at Scary Mommy, or Shine from Yahoo. I’m just going to take a page from Andrew Dice Clay, maybe some Eddie Murphy, and some Sam Kinison- you know, all those comedians who respected women in the 80s. Men who I thought were funny, until I grew up and learned to respect women.



So here goes. Here are the responses I believe Mrs. Gallegher, and Scary Mommy, were hoping to get when they posted this article- and not the thousands of angry responses they actually got from other women who also agree this joke is tired. Are they my own thoughts? No. I wouldn’t touch this article with a ten foot pole. But it’s nice to have a creative writing exercise every once in a while (right Rebecca?). So here are the ANGRY responses I think they actually wanted from men, instead of all the groans they got from women.

Rebuttal: 10 Ways Your Husband Is just Another Child - The “Angry Men” version (Original post by Rebecca Gallagher for Scary Mommy):

(Link to orignial post)


1. He gets so hungry on outings as a family, you give him the protein bar you keep for the kids in your purse for snack emergencies.


Angry Man Rebuttal: Because you were too controlling to let him get any popcorn before you made him sit through Les Miserables. 


2. He would rather play video games than clean the garage or do any chores.

Angry Man Rebuttal: Yeah, male or female, who wouldn't?


3. He'll leave his underwear on the bathroom floor.

Angry Man Rebuttal: That was foreplay! You should try it some time.


4. He forgets to hang up his towel.

Angry Man Rebuttal
: He would if there was a place for his towel next to the three you use when you get out of the tub, the one you wrap around your head and your over-sized bathrobe.


5. He leaves his ice cream bar wrapper on the end table by the couch.

Angry Man Rebuttal: That’s because it wasn’t empty and there was still a bite left in there that he was saving for later.


6. You have to remind him where things go in the kitchen.

Angry Man Rebuttal: So you know where to find all the grilling utensils that he packed away in the garage at the end of last summer then?


7. He would rather stay up and watch a stupid TV show than go to bed at a reasonable hour.

Angry Man Rebuttal: Hard to watch Peruvian soap operas (soft-core porn) with an audience.


8. When you ask him to take the garbage out, he rolls his eyes.


Angry Man Rebuttal: He might be rolling his eyes because you stuff the thing so full that he’s going to throw out his back trying to get the bag out of the bin.


9. He needs to be reminded to not eat junk food when he goes out with his friends.


Angry Man Rebuttal
: No he doesn’t... you already called the bar ahead of time and told them he’s only allowed lite beer, baked (not deep fried) wings, and calorie wise dipping sauce.


10. He stashes his Brussels sprouts to the side of the plate hoping you won't notice he didn't eat them.


Angry Man Rebuttal: What the f@#$ are Brussels sprouts? With the strict no meat, no diary, no anything good diet you have him on he probably thought those were vegan meatballs. Eww.

 

Alright, maybe I don't write “angry” so well. But I can both tell and take a joke. I can also tell a fresh one every now and then without ripping off Joan River’s act from the 1950’s.


So ladies, can we leave the dad bashing jokes up to the pros? The ladies who actually tell funny ones? Or better yet, let’s all try to remember that co-parenting is about respect and if you want the help of your partner it may be in your best interests to build him up every once in a while rather then trying to tear him down. After all, you married him. And from that point-of-view, the jokes really on you.


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Reader Comments (4)

"Problem is, too often, there is a type of mom who tries to make a joke directed at dads and the real joke is on her - it's not funny." - AWESOME!!!

March 10, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBrandon Klinetobe

Really. If the man is so awful and stupid , the fact that married him makes you the truly stupid one.

March 10, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJoe

Well done sir. All great rebuttals.

March 11, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBlair P

Aside from the cleaning up after himself stuff the rest just makes women sound bad so shame on her. Who the hell needs to control what time their husband goes to bed and what he eats? That's absolutely ridiculous! If you're that woman SHAME ON YOU! Your husbands not a child you're just choosing to treat him like one! No one wants to have sex with their mother ladies!!!!

March 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterChelle

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